a Mother in Search of the Unbearable Lightness of Being

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Met up with my girlfriends last night and was posed the question, “Is it ok to have sex during pregnancy?” This happened to be one of the first few questions I unabashedly asked my obstetrician during my first visit.

And the answer? A big fat ‘Yes’ (except for women with high risk pregnancies).

For the nitty gritty details, our Health Promotion Board actually has a pretty good article on ‘Sex During Pregnancy‘. Not bad, Singapore!

As compared to our SEA neighbours, Singapore is at the very least making an effort to improve on our pronatalist policies. In my course of work, I have to be familiar with the labor laws across countries like Singapore, Indonesia, Malaysia, Philippines, Myanmar, as well as India and Australia and New Zealand (ANZ). ANZ aside, Singapore ranks first in terms of our government mandated maternity/ paternity/ parental/ childcare leave entitlement. But I do think Singapore needs to strive harder and benchmark against the developed countries. Better pro-family schemes and bigger baby bonuses please.

Back to sex, here are 10 Things Dads-to-Be Need to Know About Sex During Pregnancy. My favourite slides are:
2. She Really Is “Too Tired” – I may look like I’m glowing but pregnancy fatigue is real.
4. The Second Trimester Is Your Best Bet – It sure felt good to be pampered at Maalifushi by COMO, Maldives. Babymoon in the second trimester is a sure win!
5. Your Baby Won’t Get Hurt When You Get Busy – Just kidding when I said you were poking Olive’s eyes.
11. Tell Her She Looks Great — No Matter What – The husband made me feel like I’m at my sexiest when pregnant and it really helped me embrace pregnancy fully.

Babymoon @ Maalifushi by Como, Maldives.

Babymoon @ Maalifushi by Como, Maldives.

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Pregnancy Insomnia. SOS!

Not an easy sleeper to begin with and then comes insomnia during pregnancy, especially now that I am in my third trimester.

The combination of Olive’s exponential growth enlarging my tummy, her frequent use of my bladder as a trampoline, and heartburn are all the reasons that lead to the sleepless nights.

The only consolation is that my usual sleeping position happens to be the best sleep position during pregnancy, i.e. the “SOS” (sleep on side) position and that helps to alleviate the discomfort. I am naturally more inclined to sleep on my left side which is supposed to be the better side as it lessens the pressure on the vena cava (main vein that returns blood to the heart) and the liver (located on the right side of the abdomen), and allows for optimum blood and nutrients flow to the placenta.

See how nature works? In your third trimester it starts preparing you for the sleepless nights to come when your baby is born.Pregnancy insomnia